The 5 friends to keep in your 20s

One of the most valuable things I have is my time.

Time is limited and there is always an opportunity cost when you choose to spend time on something, or on someone.  As I’ve grown up, I’ve realized just how important it is to choose quality relationships and to spend time on things and people that matter.

With the start of work and learning to live independently without my mom packing lunches for me anymore, I really had to evaluate how I was spending my time, and who I was spending my time with.  Because it’s not just about the few hours you hang out with your friends.  There’s a lasting emotional effect of who you choose to surround yourself with.

I’ve been fortunate enough to find friends who inspire me and make me feel the happiest I’ve been in years.  Friends who I would happily choose to invest my time and energy into.  Friends that I prioritize, through the good and the bad.

The following list goes both ways — friends who give you the happiness and support but also friends who you’d do the same for.

1. The ones that make you feel like home.

There are some people you meet in life that make you feel comfortable, safe, and like you belong.  These are the people to keep around.  No matter how crazy life gets or how crazy you get, these are the friends that open their arms and hold you until the crazy disappears.   These are the friends picking up your calls at 3am and these are the friends you go out of your way for to make them feel on top of the world. These are the ones that you can’t fathom living without.  When you cry, they cry.  When you walk into the corner of the table, they laugh and make sure you’re okay.  These are the friends who accept you for who you are, every insane and broken and beautiful piece of you.

2. The ones that want what’s best for you.

Whenever I have a career dilemma or just need an opinion about something insignificant like what colour phone I should get next, I know who I can turn to.  These are the friends who I trust and who know me well.  These are the great people who are willing to put themselves in my shoes.  On the flip side, these are the friends I care enough about to never let them date the same guy who hurt them or call them out on scandalous outfits.  Sometimes some tough love with people with your best interest in mind is exactly what we all need.  That person who keeps you on your path and out of trouble.

3. The ones that inspire you.

Not a day goes where I’m not in awe of or inspired by my friends.  They’re good people who are successful, funny, intelligent, beautiful, caring, passionate, clever, witty, and all the great things that I love.  They make me want to be a better person.  They remind me that there is good in this world.  I have nothing but praise for my friends.  Surround yourself with good people.  Be a good person.  At the root of it, it’s all about love.

4. The ones that make you laugh.

A lot of times, we can’t control or change what life gives us.  The good, the bad, the ugly–we just need to learn to roll with the punches.  What makes it all easier to handle is having someone by your side to laugh through all the craziness with you.  Someone to enjoy life with.  Keep the friends you laugh so hard with that it feels like you’ve been at the gym working out your abs for 10 hours, with tears streaming down your face (think: laughing emoji with tears).  Keep the friends who can put a smile on your face when you’re feeling down.  Keep the friends you actually enjoy spending time with.  The ones you actually look forward to seeing and the ones you miss when you’ve been away for too long.  Invest in the friends who make you happy.

5. The ones that challenge you.

The best people to surround yourself with are the ones who challenge you to be the best version of yourself.  Who won’t accept it when you want to take the easy way out when the hard way is probably better for you.  You wouldn’t let your friend stay in a dead-end job they hate just because changing a career is “hard”, and they do the same for you.  Keep the friends who challenge your perceptions and disagree with you sometimes.  They’re going to open your mind up and teach you new lessons.  They’re going to help you achieve your goals.  They’re going to keep 3am conversations alive with heated discussions about life, love, and moral values.  Keep the friends who let you make your mistakes and pick you up afterwards.  They can’t give you all the answers, you’ll never learn.  The best of friends flourish and grow together.

5friendstokeep

Cheers to the best friends in the world and to my wonderful squad who inspired this post!

With love,

T

 

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